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Real stepmom

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I catch myself being reminded that I did not give birth to them maybe once or twice a year and it has the same impact of running through the house and hitting a sliding glass door when you thought it was open.

It hurts. They act like me. They think like me. They even look like me in subtle ways. My oldest son looks identical to my husband but they share no blood.

Our kids are closer than any full blooded siblings that I know. They call each other brother and sister. We are a family. Our kids have tons of grandparents, extra parents, and more love than they know what to do with.

I am momma and I wear that title proudly. They are diminishing my role in their lives and the kids pick up on that and think maybe they should see me differently.

I have to keep moving forward and no let the pain show to them because then they feel like they did something wrong and hurt me. Since my kids are older this is harder to do because they have learned how to tell when a person lies or is hiding something from facial expressions or if you become red in the face or pale.

They can see my heart in my eyes and it makes it really hard to keep them from feeling guilt. I want them to treat me how they see me from their heart, not out of fear of hurting my feeling or guilt.

I want them to come to me for advice as they are finding their way in this world on how to handle relationship problems even with their biological family.

My children have been encouraging me for 4 years now to start fostering other kids. They tell me that I would be able to give them a home and love that they may need to turn their lives around and make a difference.

Now that I only have 2 at home, both of which will be graduating in the next 2 years and moving out, I am really considering it.

I will be the worst empty-nester ever to live after being so used to having between kids at my home everyday for the past 10 years.

I have been a step mom for the last three years to two teenagers 1 daughter and 1 son. The kids live with their father and I on a full time basis.

Their biological mother sees them when it is convenient for her and when she is leading a positive life style. She has drinking issue and depression.

The kids and I get along very well for the most part until their mom goes through a rough spell and then I am treated like the devil.

That can be so frustrating! I had a friend at work correct me awhile back. That asked me I kept them fed, provided, shelter, love, support, healthcare, and anything they need or want?

Would you die to protect and keep them safe.? Will you go to any length and make any sacrifice for their happiness? Of course I responded with of course without question.

They looked at me and said then you are their mom. I am unable to have my own biological kids, but god put Jeff in my life and in turn brought 2 amazingly wonderful children, Alex and Alyssa, into my life.

My heart is beyond full. Being a parent is far from easy, but DNA is not what makes you a parent. You and I are neither beach homes nor bartending shifts; we are real wives, married to real husbands.

Today has been such a struggle for me as a stepmom. I needed to read this tonight more than ever.

I gained severe anxiety from it and I am trying to get through it. I love him like he is my own, without ever overstepping, yet I am always the bad guy.

Today his bio mom had another one of her fits and I have tried all day to not burst into tears. While reading this I let all my emotions flow and I feel so much better.

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